For Better or For Worse

A couple years ago I was invited to a get together and only women were invited, (I definitely appreciated the invitation) I’m still not quite sure why I got invited, but hey I learned something that night…… Did you know that some women are actually taught that NO MATTER WHAT your man does you should just suck it up and stay with him. I was in a room listening to women tell different ways that they have handled situations in their marriages, (that I view as unforgivable) I was amazed, because I was trying to figure out who taught them this shit. And as I was driving home I was still thinking even if someone taught them that it’s still your decision as an adult to know when to leave a toxic situation. That night I became very appreciative of the women that had a hand in raising me, I couldn’t imagine laying next to a person who KNOWS no matter what they do I’m not going anywhere, because I was taught to fight through the pain just to claim some years….

“For better or for worse”, does not mean you get to break a persons’ heart and think they’ll get over it. However, I heard it with my own ears, seen them say it with my own eyes. I was screaming so loud inside, “ya’ll trippin”. This is why you need to know your worth before you even think of becoming someone’s partner especially their life partner. And I hate to say this, but whoever programs this inside of a girl’s mind needs their ass beat. “We made vows, under God”, they said. Well Sweetie, those vows were broken when that man you sitting up looking stupid about stepped outside of the marriage, (guys you can also learn from this as well) and I’m not talking about just cheating. When the person that you said your vows to starts to become a person you don’t recognize and you try to seek help but they refuse to comply….. NEWSFLASH: that is no longer the person you said vows with.

The biggest eye rolls go to the women that aren’t even married and playing housewife, but going through all this foolery like there is some kind of prize at the end for putting up with bad behavior. Numbers do make your relationship relevant…. especially if a lot of those numbers had you sacrificing your sanity. “I come from a family where you fight for your partner”, they said……. Sweetie, I come from a family where you get right or get left, PERIOD!!!! I can do bad by my damn self!!!! In the process of this God forbid you have children around, because you have successfully FUCKED them up…. You teaching them it’s about years and not about how someone is supposed to treat them and love them. It’s really relationships out here that are glorified by YEARS! No ma’am, love yourself enough young women to the point where even if you love a person with every cell in your body,  if you are not being appreciated and treated like the princess you are and with YEARS the queen you will be….. you have to remove yourself from that toxic situation for you own sake. I can’t stand these women out here with all these years that have more war stories about their marriage, than love stories out here trying to give advice.

“For better or for worse” my ass, make sure you know yourself and know love before you start to believe that YEARS are more important than the tears you cry trying to obtain that level of stupidity. I know marriage can be ugly sometimes and I’m not saying the first argument is a red flag, it’s when you start to see the smoke and you’re so blinded by wanting those years, that you didn’t even notice that a whole forest fire is in your backyard…. but you so deep in you’d rather burn up with your partner, than to grab what you can if you can even grab anything and start all over by yourself….. “For better or for worse” will drive you insane and ultimately kill who you really are if you don’t know who you are. However, I witnessed this being said by women who said they were taught to think that way…. So what do I know?!

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